4/5/24

 Friday, Aril 5 2024

Lights out at 10, up at 3:30 & let Lilly out.  35°, high of 43°  NNW zt 10, 5-12/20.  6:25, 7:23, 12+58.

Pain, etc.  The pain was pretty bad in both the left shoulder and the right wrist/hand during the night.  I'm wondering whether using the massage gun was a mistake.   

I'm grateful that I received a call from Kristin at the VA Geriatric Clinic this morning.  She scheduled me for an initial appointment on April 17 at 1:40, preferably with Geri present.  She also conducted an initial interview that took 20 minutes or more with information that will be shared with all the participants in the April 17 meeting.    

Ruth Marcus and Jennifer Rubin.  Each has a column in this morning's WaPo and each is telling.  Rubin's column (Israel is at a crisis point: The world has had enough) concludes:  "When Netanyahu finally does depart, Israel will be left more isolated, unstable and bereft of goodwill than at any point in its history. It might take decades to recover from Netanyahu’s legacy."(My italics)   Ruth Marcus wrote: "Six months after a day on which more Jews were murdered than since the Holocaust, Israel finds itself nearing the status of international pariah. How could this have happened?"    Some thoughts:

1. Netanyahu is not a usurper of power, as Trump tried to be between the November 2020 election and January 6th.  He is in power because the Israeli Jewish electorate put him in power.  And his most recent accession to power was not a fluke: he has served as prime minister of Israel longer than any other leader, including David Ben Gurion.  

2.  "No Left left."  The Israeli electorate is right-wing,  The problem with Israel is not Netanyahu; it is the Israeli electorate that empowers him and others like him, like Ariel Sharon and Menachem Begin.   In the U.S., we talk as if Trump is the problem, ignoring the fact that he garnered 48% of the popular vote in his losing 2020 re-election campaign, more than the 46% he won in his winning 2016 campaign.  These crypto-fascists have power because our neighbors and fellow citizens give them power.  Pogo: We have met the enemy and he is us.

3.  The saturation destruction within Gaza along with Israel's claim that it adheres to all the laws of war, international humanitarian law, and the Genocide Convention reminds me of the old punch line: "Who are you going to believe, me or your lying eyes."  Jennifer Rubin's anodyne observation is: "When massive civilian casualties including aid workers continue, there is reason to question compliance with international law."

4.  Zips, zipperheads, dinks, gooks.  Towelheads, camel jockeys, sand niggers, terrorists.   There is a lot of hatred of Palestinians among the Israeli Jews.  There is a lot of hatred of Israeli Jews among the Palestinians.  Each group has cause to harbor all that hatred toward the other.   American fighters in Vietnam were there to kill and to avoid being killed by Vietnamese enemies.  The VC and NVA fighters were there to kill and to avoid being killed by us.  Moreover, 'they all looked alike.'  You couldn't tell whether the Vietnamese civilian you saw on the road or in the ville during the day was a VC fighter at night, or at least a supporter or perhaps supplier to the VC who wanted to kill you.  LBJ, Richard Nixon, Robert McNamara, and Henry Kissinger spoke of our great struggle to save the good Vietnamese from the bad Vietnamese.  To Americans on the ground, the great struggle was to be saved from the Vietnamese who wanted us dead, or in any event, gone from their country.  So we called them names: gooks, dinks, zipperheads or zips.  I believe the same thing goes on in Israel about the Palestinians.  In America, people prejudiced against Arabs call them towelheads, or camel jockeys, or sand niggers, or simply terrorists.  I don't know how Israeli Jews refer to Palestinians, or at least the Palestinians in the Occupied Territories (including Gaza), but we can be sure it is not affectionate.  I suspect they are all considered supporters and perhaps suppliers of terrorists, the Hamas militants.  They are accurately thought of as the people who elected Hamas to govern Gaza back in 2006 and who thereby enabled them to fortify Gaza for its rocket and missile attacks against targets in Israel, who enabled them to dig miles of tunnels under Gaza as an aid to killing Jews and protecting themselves.  Ruth Marcus wrote " . . .  I did not realize the extent to which the Israeli public resists providing humanitarian aid to Gaza while the hostages remain in captivity."  She also wrote "This has brought out the worst in the Israeli public, with some protesters going so far as to block aid convoys. An overwhelming majority of Israeli Jews say the suffering of civilians in Gaza should be taken into account to a small extent or not at all — a hardening of the heart that, to me, feels fundamentally un-Jewish."  The fear of war's purposeful death and destruction does that to people, to all of us.

4/4/24

Thursday, April 4, 2024

 Lights out and on the BL at 10, awake at 1:30, lights on and let Lilly out at 1:50.  35° and windy enough to see the little flower stalks on the pachysandra being buffeted.  High of 41° with some snow expected in the morning.  The wind is NNW at 15 mph, 12-20/32.  3,2" of snowfall in the last 24 hours with another 0.6" expected today.  Sunrise at 6:27 at 81°, sunset at 7:22 at 279°, 12+55.  Solar noon at 12:54, altitude 53°.

Pain, etc.  I had both shoulder pain and wrist/hand pain when I got up.  The support glove from the VA doesn't diminish the nighttime pain so I removed it and massaged the palm of my hand, which helps.  Yesterday I used the massage gun on my shoulder which seemed to help so I'll use it again today.

I haven't succeeded in 'learning to live with' the chronic pain yet, despite acupuncture, hypnotherapy, 'healing touch', and mindfulness attempts.  The last several days, including the entire visit by Sarah and Christian, I have been in a bit of a funk, a bit seized up with the pains, including hips and back.  I received the normal question about wanting a wheelchair from the check-in clerk at the VA yesterday and gave my normal negative reply, wondering though when I would be saying 'yes, please.'  I've used the airport wheelchair service on my last two air trips, i.e., to Sarah's wedding in 2016 and to visit Kitty in 2021.  I suppose it's a matter of time before I use it at Zablocki, along with the Valet Parking service.  Geri has been kindly doing my job of kitchen clean-up recently which I very much appreciate but resist as more evidence of my recent (?) enfeeblement.  My cognitive/executive function decline is becoming ever clearer to me and is evident (along with the funk) in the most recent journal (non)entries.

I'm grateful that the bladder fulguration on 3/5 has rid me of the CPP I had been dealing with since October 2022.  All that pain and discomfort and its effect on mobility seem to have been due to the lesions in my bladder, making me regret not having requested a cystoscopy earlier.  I've started taking daily misoprostol again in the hope that it will delay the reoccurrence of the lesions and will have another cystoscopy in a couple of months to check on the aftermath of the last fulguration.  The next one will be like the last one, i.e., without unanesthetized fulguration.  It is still a mystery to me how some undergo fulguration without anesthesia while the VA urologists are so ready to schedule me for the full OR treatment on my request.

Replicating Kitty's insomnia.  

    

4/3/24

 Wednesday, April 3, 2024

On the BL and lights out around 10, up around 2:45.  34°, high of 40°, snowy conditions from 4 to 11, then more rain.  The wind is WNW at 14 mph, 12-17/30.  1.4" of rain in the last 24 hours, 0.25" expected in the next 24.  Sunrise at 6:29, sunset at 7:21, 12+52.

Pain, etc.  The shoulder and wrist pain upon awakening is not as bad this morning as before.  Am I nonetheless awake because of it or is it simply insomnia?  Later in the early morning, however, the pain became pretty bad again, especially in my right wrist and hand.  I applied Diclofenac to the wrist and to the top and palm of my hand, concerned about my grip of the steering wheel to and from the VA this morning (the Hand Clinic re-scheduled appointment for the one on missed last Friday.)  It took me a good half hour to get dressed this morning, even without the compression socks.  It's getting harder to take care of myself.  Unless something changes for the better, I'm in real trouble.

I'm grateful for the decreased pain during the night and early morning.  Is it because of the 1300 mg. of Tylenol I took at 'bedtime'?

Marlon Brando's 100th birthday.  I watched a clip of the On the Waterfront scene of him and Rod Steiger in the car.  "It was you, Charlie. . . And what happens, he gets a title shot outdoors in a ballpark and what do I get?  I get a one way ticket to Palookaville.  You was my brother, Charlie.  You shoulda looked out for me a little bit.  You shoulda taken care of me just a little bit so I wouldn't have to take them dives for the short-end money. . . . You don't understand.  I coulda had class.  I coulda been a contender.  I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am.  Let's face it.  It was you, Charlie."  Is there a greater scene in movie history?

No good deed goes unpunished.  From this morning's WaPo: "Wisconsin voters opted Tuesday to ban private funding for election administration, joining more than two dozen states that have ended or limited the practice after Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg and his wife spent $350 million to help local governments run elections during the coronavirus pandemic.  Zuckerberg and his wife, Priscilla Chan, were the primary funders of the Center for Tech and Civic Life, which gave grants to election administrators around the country in 2020 so they could expand their mail voting operations, set up curbside voting programs, and purchase ballot tabulators, face masks and other supplies.  I'm feeling some shame at not having learned about the origin and significance of the two referenda questions on Tuesday's ballot.

VA Hand Clinic.   I apologized for missing Friday's appointment.  I was given a tight glove to try at night and a sponge squeeze-thing for strengthening my hand muscles, but basically was told I better learn how to live with the hand/wrist pain.

Israeli drones killed 7 humanitarian workers in clearly marked vehicles delivering food to starving Gazans in clearly marked vehicles.  Netanyahu says it was "unintentional."  Bide says he is "outraged and heartbroken."  The U.S. keeps giving Netanyahu bombs, bullets, and F-35s to keep killing anything that moves in Gaza.  I am reminded of the "free fire zones" in Vietnam.  Two thoughts: There is about a zero chance that the destruction of the World Central Kitchens vehicles was "unintentional."  Drones don't fire their missiles without a command from a ground controller.  The controller can see what he is targeting.  That 'eyelock' is what permits the drone to target so precisely.  The IDF controller clearly intended to strike the 3 vehicle humanitarian convoy and to kill the occupants.  Perhaps the strike was somehow based on a mistake or negligence but it was not unintentional.  And about poor Joe Biden's being "outraged and heartbroken", spare us your feelings, Joe and stop being the principal enabler of Israeli bloodlust.

No bad deed goes unrewarded by the wicked: A group of Republican congressmen want to rename Dulles International Airport Trump International.

John Barth has died at age 93, the author of one of my favorite books, The Sot Weed Factor, published in 1960 and read by me some years thereafter.  I started Giles' Goat-boy but never finished it.

4/2/24

 Tuesday, April 2, 2024

On the BL and lights out at 10, awake at 3:02, and lights on at 3:20.  38°, high 40°, cold, rainy and snowy day ahead.  Wind ENE at 16, 13-21/36. 0.2" rain in the last 24, 1.45" expected in the next 24. Sunrise at 6:30, sunset at 7:20, 12+49.

Pain, etc.  The usual shoulder(s) and wrist pain during the night and on awakening.  

I'm grateful for   

4/1/24

 Monday, April 1, 2024

April Fools Dau

On the BL before 10:30 when Geri turned off the TV, awake at 3:54 to let Lilly out, and again at 4:30.  36°, high of 42°,  Wind NE at 12, 3-17/28.Sunrise at 6:32, sunset at 7:19, 12+46.

Pain, etc.  Left shoulder and right wrist pain are both pretty nasty in the early morning.  I read the label instructions last night for Tylenol 8 Hour Arthritis tabs.  "Do not take more than 10 days unless instructed by your doctor." Also warnings of severe liver damage.  

3/31/24

 Easter Sunday, March 31, 2024

On the LZB around 9, up around, stuck because of mechanism, off to BL, up at 3, and again at 5.  35°, high of 44°, 50% chance of rain.  The wind is ENE at 4 mph, 2-6/10.  Sunrise at 6:34, sunset at 7:17, 12+43.

Pain, etc.  I had a very painful night, especially my shoulders and right wrist and hand.  I can't remember whether I took Tylenol before going to bed LZB. but in any event, I didn't apply Diclofenac.  Causal?  The reclining mechanism on the LZB got stuck when I tried to lower the chair and get up but fortunately, it was fairly close to the down position so I could get out of the chair with quite a bit of effort to scoot my butt over my feet for leverage. I moved out to the BL at some point and took 1,000 mg. of Tylenon at about 4 a.m.(?) and read some newspapers on my lapta\op.  I woke up later at about 7:30 with the open laptop on my lap.

I'm grateful     

j088h

3/30/24

 Saturday, March 30, 2024

On the BL all night, awake at 2:30, lights on at 3 a.m., with lots of pain, especially left shoulder and right hand/wrist.  38°, rain, high of 45°, wind E at 9 mph, 3-12/20.  Sunrise at 6:36, sunset at 7:16, 12+40.

Pain, etc.  I had a lot of pain (7)?) on awakening in both shoulders, right wrist and hand, back, and hips.  I took 1,000 mg. of Tylenol at 4 a.m.  I'm not applying Diclofenac to my left shoulder because my right shoulder's ROM is too limited by pain to reach all of my left shoulder.

I'm grateful     

More random and not-so-random thoughts on Israel AT 3:20 a.m.

(1)  For 34 of the past 47 years, Israel's prime ministers have come from the Likud Party.  For half of the 34 years that Likus governed Israel, Netanyahu was prime minister.  In the last 48 years, Democrats have occupied the White House for 24 years and Republicans for 24.

(2) Likud is Israel's Republican Party.  Netanyahu is Israel's Trump.  Both have been indicted for serious crimes.  Each seeks to retain or reacquire power to shield himself from prosecution.  Each is secular and probably an atheist but each relies on religious zealots for political support. Each is a scheming conniver and views relationships transactionally, i.e., what's in it for me.  Each has little respect for the so-called 'Rule of Law.'  Each considers himself to be 'the Chosen One', the only one who can properly run his country.  The big difference between the two is that Netanyahu is really smart, much smarter than Trump.  He also has some loyalty to Israel in ways that Trump doesn't have to the U.S.

(3)  Biden has authorized another massive shipment of bombs and fighter jets to Israel including 1,800 2,000 bombs.